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Tuesday, May 10, 2011

sometimes...


Sometimes life isn't all puppy dogs and cupcakes and rainbows...sometimes I miss my family so much that it hurts...sometimes I feel lonely....other times I don't.
Sometimes I feel "at home" here in the Yukon...other times I feel that I don't belong...sometimes I wish the day to speed up so that I can rest and have some "alone time"... other times I wish for time to stop because there is a moment in the day that catches my breath.
Sometimes I feel healthy and energetic...other times I'm tired, uninspired and feel generally "blah"... sometimes I feel present and sometimes I feel disconnected, all at once.
Sometimes I wonder if I ever will live my dream, a cottage by the sea in P.E.I....sometimes I tell myself that this is "my dream", right here and right now.
Sometimes I realize that someday my baby boy will be all grown up... and I have to remind myself to slow down and count each little line on the palm of his hand...sometimes I have to pinch myself and tell myself that this is real and that I am blessed beyond my understanding...that I have been given so many gifts, gifts of love from my family and friends.
Sometimes just getting it out makes me feel better.
xox


7 comments:

  1. This is beautiful, Johanna. And so many of the things you say echo the way I feel a lot of the time.

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  2. wow, I could have written this word for word (but not so eloquently). Simply beautiful

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  3. I think we all dream of something else, which is fine, but we also need to bring our focus back to the here and now, which is what you are doing.

    I think it must be very difficult to be moved to the north like you were. Although a wonderful experience in so many ways, I can see how it must be very difficult at the same time.

    Hopefully one day your PEI cottage will be a reality.

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  4. I totally understand how you feeling not at "home". When we were in Nunavut I missed home, and now that I've been back "home" for 2 years, I'm having dreams about being back at "home" in Nunavut! I can't win!

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  5. great post, and i totally relate. miss you too. btw, noah's hair looks SO cute!

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  6. Nodding my head at each word.
    You write so beautifully Jo.

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