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Monday, December 16, 2013

little bits lately














Yesterday I set out in the chilly (-20) afternoon for a snowshoe. Although it was cold outside, the fresh air and newly fallen snow called my name, and I needed a little escape. I pulled Noah along in the sled, and boy, what a work out it was. Along the way we stopped to slide down a mini hill, and we looked at animal tracks ( could these be elves' footprints we wondered?) There was so much beauty to take in. The colours were so subtle, with cool whites, pale pinks, blues and mauve. It felt so refreshing to be outside in the cool crisp environment. 
There is much excitement in the community this week as we host open houses (the RCMP detachment held one this morning and the health center will have one on Wednesday. Tomorrow is the Christmas feast and children's Christmas concert, we will indulge in a big turkey dinner (everyone in the community is welcome) and Santa will pay us a visit, and hand out a gift to each child. We've had neighbours drop off all kinds of yummy baking, while our string of Christmas cards continues to grow each day.
In other totally unrelated news, lately I have been doing a little bit of soul searching when it comes to my parenting style/discipline style. I'm not a big fan of the word discipline, but I am also not a big fan of having no discipline. I really believe that it is a parent's duty to teach their children what is right and wrong in the world, and I am always trying to find new strategies to use with my little ones.
Lately it feels as though the dynamics in our household have been a little bit crazy. There is so much young energy from my littles, and I am learning that while I want to embrace and encourage them to learn, play, explore, that I also have to set limits for them, or else I get overwhelmed and lose my own self control. Noah and Katia have such different personalities. What worked with Noah at the age of 2, definitely does not work with Katia and everyday I am learning to navigate Katia's needs for understanding her world.
There has been much discussion in my parenting circle of friends about discipline lately. So many people have such different ways of parenting and disciplining. At the end of the day, what I am trying my very best to do is to discipline in a positive, encouraging, proactive way, that will strengthen our relationship and build up my kids. Sometimes we simply remove ourselves (the kids and myself) from the situation and talk about it. This works very well for Noah, who can really understand right from wrong and can identify his feelings and those of others. Katia is still at a very young age, where she can really get upset and throw tantrums when she doesn't get her way, or is tired. What works best for her is a timeout (even though I am not a big fan of the idea, it works for Katia). I am doing my very best these days to try and understand their point of views and to react calmly to them. I know that my actions are teaching them how to react to the world. If I lose my cool and yell, they will see this and think that this is how to deal with a frustrating situation. Yes, we all yell and lose our cool now and then, but it can't be the way that we deal with things all the time. So I am doing my best because I know that my little ones are watching and learning.
While it is hard to step back and admit that I am not always doing the right thing when it comes to parenting (losing my cool, raising my voice), it feels even better to look for help and seek out ideas and strategies to help me. For those ever looking for a great quick and easy parenting resource, I highly recommend Dr. Sears and his section on discipline. 





6 comments:

  1. you're a great mama! give yourself credit where it's due, once in awhile

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  2. Ha! I was thinking you were so impressive that you went out when it's so cold- and you are!- but realized it's celcius! Thanks for your thoughts on discipline. Always an on-going conversation!

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    1. Sarah- my American friends tell me that when it gets to anything below zero, that Fahrenheit and Celcius are the same thing. So your -20 is the same as our -20.

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    2. ooops I am wrong, you are right, our -20 is 0 for you.

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  3. you are a great mother. these are the most beautiful photos. xo

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  4. Isn't it amazing how you can get such beautiful pictures with such detail and subtle color as you said, when to some people it is "just all white"? What an impressive mama - snowshoeing while pulling your son on a sled in negative temps - wow! Santa better be nice to you this year! I think it is the sign of a good parent that you recognize that you cannot follow a one size fits all approach to discipline. We are just getting into the tantrum stage around here, so we will see how it all plays out. I am not one for following a particular style or method of anything - I just kind of go with that seems like common sense to me and what fits our lifestyle.
    And if anyone wants to stop by, it is Hump Day Give-A-Way on my blog.

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